What feels like the End is often the Beginning

Hi my name is Heather and this is my FIRST post into the blogging world. Ok so I secretly feel like I just stood up at an AA meeting and said hello to everyone in that sort of fashion. No disrespect to AA attenders but I must applaud you for the courage you have to stand up in a room full of people and tell your story. I may not be doing this face to face in person BUT I am exposing myself to the public for the first time ever while leaving no stone unturned (Good, Bad, & Very Ugly)... AND for the first time speaking out since my mother passed away.
I have been a constant blog follower of so many and wished I could do my own and for a while my friends convinced me I would be great at a blog that tells you about what beauty products work and which ones clearly don't (I have no problem admitting that I will try every new product out there, cheap, expensive... Not just store bought either, those infomercials have gotten me late at night... Malibu Pilates. Thank you Susan Lucci for your amazing persuasion.) I digress.
My reason for finally taking this step and starting a blog is because I found a reason and a place where I belong. If it's just for me to journal, so be it... If I can reach out to ppl and give them tons of knowledge I have acquired by the age of 31 that would be amazing... but if I can just reach one person that would be amazing.

My inspiration:
This is my amazing mother whom went to heaven July 2, 2015. Sometimes you will never know the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory. Yet their are some our there that know just what I am talking about. She was my mother, my comforter, my inspiration to want more for myself, my caretaker even when I was 28 and sick, but my top 3 most important things she was to me: 1) my encourager to use the talents God gave me in painting 2) To fight till the end and never give up any battle big or small.. which makes her my hero & 3) my teacher, as she taught me more in one year of how to walk a beautiful walk in faith, for that made my walk with God stronger.

My last year of my life has not been anywhere near ideal nor has it turned out to be the life I thought I'd have. That's why it's SO important to me to let everyone know how precious life really

is and no one is invincible. If you still have both of your parents (especially to my friends out there) just love them, that's all my mom wanted and in the end all you have is family anyway. Hug your mom for me because I can't or hug your dad for me, because my close friend whom has been exactly where I am, can't. But then again what am I saying this world revolves around text not physical stuff anymore, so just text them a simple "I love you". You'll look back and be grateful you did. 

My mom carried me for 9 miserably, mostly hot months, as I sat on a nerve that made her itch the whole time. Good things combs were invented because I believe she kept one by her side at all times..... I literally knew her from the inside first. To think I was so close to her actual heart gives me chills. Every mother deserves love for what they do to get you here. And mine... Well she's not supposed to be gone yet. I was only 30. She didn't get to see my major milestones. However I know she will just like I know when we asked God for healing, he gave us that but in a different form than we anticipated.

She is the only reason I get up and go to work. To go back a few steps, I uprooted my life I had for her. I will tell you about Bile Duct Cancer and our journey in another post. And it may take part one all the way to part four to explain what my life has entailed and  how we did all we could to keep her alive. It's a scary journey we took but we met amazing people that played huge roles in our journey and they will forever be apart of our lives. 

Like Patty who is a miracle walking. She has the same cancer and is still thriving years after diagnosis. Can't wait to tell you what this "spitfire" (as she calls me) did.

And then there is Joel a cancer survivor who was moms radiation tech. He kept her laughing and honestly they shared a unique bond that I probably won't ever know all the jokes or statements they made, all that matters is he helped make her treatments easier.

Oh and did I mention my mother set me up on a blind date with him! That's another post to come. He has continued to be part of my inspiration to keep going on with this new life I now have. 

Lastly I will always talk about my amazing sister and how she literally took every step with my mother as I wish I could have. However God's plan was for my sister to be my mothers constant caretaker/nurse which was a blessing. (Love you K)

For now I will end my first post. My blog is not meant to be all about my mom, its meant to be about my life. Some posts may involve my amazing friends and family or about something random on my mind.

But for now I leave you with this... I was going to edit the date out of the pic but I decided it's the best way to show you all the TRUTH in how drastically your life can change in a year.

Oh and those fur babies, besides the one photo bombing it in the back.. (she is mine) and one other not pictured are now mine. 4 dogs...I feel like I officially have one grown child! But I am taking care of them just like my mom asked me too.

I LOVE YOU MOM, My Beautiful July 7!

Love to All reading this!