Why the name? (PART 1)

With no stoned unturned... Let the journey begin...
Deciding on what to call my blog was a quick process. It hasn't been in the past when I wanted to start my "beauty blog", so I truly think God was holding out on me, and telling me 'wait you will have a better story to tell, have patience'.

This is true I have a better story to tell than talk about any and all beauty products. This story is far beyond what I thought I'd write about but it's my story and I waited and gave God time to let me go through, a no so great journey, but change my life in such ways that I feel it's possible I can help others for the better. If not help them then I can at least help myself by having this journaled for a keepsake.

My Beautiful July

My true inspiration to blog or finally start blogging is because of Patty, I mentioned in my first post.

At the beginning of our journey when mom was diagnosed, June 6th, 2014. Over one week she was told by two hospitals that she had a year to live and ... Well for ME that wasn't good enough. I would take 2 or 3 but not just 1 year. I just told her mom we all have bumps in our road. We fall but we get back up... so we fight and we get on with our lives. We are in this together, we all have cancer, not just you.

So while my family was grieving this news and shut themselves off from the world and went to our lake house. I unfortunately could not be there with them, as I lived 2 hours away and had a job I had to be at. Yet every being in me couldn't allow myself to not experience the pain with them so I started to research (they refused to hear about it or read up on this specific cancer). So with one whole day of scrolling through article after article and getting the same statistic of one year (which began to make me numb and sick because how could this be?) How could this happen to my mom. She is the youngest of 6 and we have never had cancer in our family.

But I kept on just wanting to find a cure, wanting to do my part or atleast try finding my part I have in this journey. Still researching after lunch because honestly how does one work with this open wound bleeding profusely and the only thing that could possibly stop the bleeding is what happens to be at my disposal... the internet. So all the while hoping our case would be different and she wouldn't be that statistic. I came across a blog, pattysjourneyoffaith.blogspot.com, a lady from Illinois that has the same cancer as mom and she has blogged her whole journey almost just about everyday. At that moment in my office I felt joy... she was still alive. I felt God truly controlled my hand as he guided my clicks. Because let me tell you, there is NOTHING out there in all the internet that talks about this cancer in leymens terms. Nothing because it is so rare. SO to fine her blog, was like finding the Holy Grail. I felt like we had a plan now. I felt like everything was going to be alright, I felt for once in my life I had a purpose and it was finding Patty.
Thus being one of the main reasons I wanted to blog as well, to share with anyone and everyone information about Bile Duct Cancer. How we got close but gave out of breath before running through that ribbon at the finish line. I will tell you things I would of done differently. I will always tell you to get into clinical trials. But these things I do not fret upon because God is in control and it was my mothers time. Although it's painfully HARD to accept but what hurts the most is my heart from missing her. I truly know what the definition of having your heart broken feels like and it's nothing compared to what you think it feels like.

After I found Patty, I drove to the lake, put on a happy face and strutted in there and said "Pack your bags... everything really IS bigger in Texas... "We are going to M.D. Anderson." Knowing my family, and seeing it being me doing the research... they were slightly taken back.. as I was too, surely you would of thought the other daughter would of been all over that. But it was me... so I had my proof to back me up. I printed out articles from MDA, proof they were advancing in this cancer. I had Patty's blog pulled up on my ipad, And I may or may not have tried to help her with a certain paste that I read has possibilities to help cancer. This was only if she said no to MDA. Alabama did just pass CBD oil to help epilepsy so I went a little along that path to get my hands on ANYTHING that would stop these tumors from growing.
Did mom think I was crazy... probably.. more so wanting to know where I got it. I will go to any lengths or shall I say I did to try to fix her. And no it is no longer in my possesion.

But I offered what I could and one day later she said ..."Ok I will go".

Part 1- Love to All Reading,

Heather